Nothing To Hide
Hmm… I contemplated writing today’s post for a number of reasons. The idea of letting someone in on my “ugly” wasn’t too appealing. It’s easy to encourage from the outside looking in but I want the people who read my post to know is
that they are not alone and I am not exempt from problems/challenges. I go through the same things and I’m just sharing what I’m learning and have learned on my journey. I realize that writing takes vulnerability but I believe in our vulnerability people are the most blessed because it’s no longer a judgment there, just a “me too.”
I was catching up with a friend the other day & we were basically just getting each other up to date on the past few years of our lives. I remember by the end of our conversation it seemed like my life had just been “happy happy with a cherry on top,” and that was so far from the truth. I could justify what I told him by saying I was just trying to focus on all the positive but I wasn’t. I was ashamed of my past. The problems that I created, the ones I didn’t create, and what I had been through. In some ways, I thought that not bringing it up meant that it never happened or existed. As much as I wanted to think “I’m just letting my past not define me,” that was far from the truth. I had let my past consume me and I had been living in the guilt, shame, and bondage of it.
It’s so easy to tell people your highlights but what about the season you went through when you wanted to give up on life? Maybe you went without a job for a while, a bad breakup, addiction, or a season of battling sickness. No matter what it is, as a child of God, we do not have to live in the shame of our past. I am by no means saying go and dump all your “ugly truth” on people, but I am saying that we should be honest, open, and talk from a place of freedom with the people we love and who have earned a right to hear our story. The past is something that we went through. The keyword is “through.” We didn’t stop there but it was only a season and by you owning it and telling your story no longer gives your past the power to define you. It takes courage to say “Yes, I did this. Yes, this happened but I am no longer there. Look at what God is doing now.”
I was sharing something with one of my best friends the other day that I had only told one person ever in my life and I remember she began to tear up and said, “Wow. Thank you for opening up with me about that Kelsie. I’ve been through the same thing, and I’ve always been ashamed to admit it but I wanted to know how to walk in the freedom of it.” What I am walking around in shame about could be the very thing that someone needs to hear that would bring them freedom in their situation. Other believers need to know that they are not alone. The most freedom I’ve had has been in having “nothing to hide” when it comes to my past. Trust me, it’s a daily process. Especially for me. I can be open with what I don’t mind people knowing or seeing but also private and guarded in other areas.
Discretion, wisdom, and being led by the Holy Spirit is vital when it comes to sharing your story. I don’t walk around telling my business to everyone (Not at all) but there is a time to share and for me to hold back just because of the fear of rejection or what someone might think of me is not authentic. Sharing my past comes with knowing who I am in Christ and knowing that I am not defined by what I have done or what has been done to me. I can own it without defining my self-worth, value, or character by it.
I am loved by God, accepted, and worth the blood of Jesus. No amount of shame can measure up to what Christ has already done on the cross for me. I can share my past without shame, I do have a story, and I do have a testimony. Jesus openly bore my shame and because of Him I don’t have to hide anything.
” Looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”
Hebrews 12:2
5 comments
Kelsey you are so right! You should always walk in your truth and NEVER be ashamed of any situation or shortcoming that happens in your life. It is there where you truly experience life and gain your character. Plus...You know the lord will guide you, heal you and protect you from those who look to cause you harm, ill will or those who try to embarrass you.
ReplyDeleteYou are such a motivation sharing this post and letting people know that it is OK to accept our "ugly truths" because they DO NOT define use but mold us to be closer to HIM!!!
Thank you for sharing this...such a touching read!
xoxo
Doris
Doris,
DeleteI'm not sure how I never responded to this, sorry! You know I am new t the platform and probably missed an email.
However, I agree with everything you said and relate to a lot of it. Thanks for taking the time to read and glad you enjoyed it.
xx, Kels
Wow. I love this. I'm so happy you linked it on the bgb twitter chat this evening. I was just commenting on how I have no problem sharing it all with people that I dont know on the internet or have barely met, but I simply cannot open up to my "close" friends. I wouldnt say I hide things, but I definitely skimp on the details. Its just too hard for me to share on some things with them. I think it's because I already know how they'll respond.. so what would be the point if you already expect a negative reaction?
ReplyDeleteSorry, just letting my mind wander here. Great post.
My blog is Roamwithrae.com, still need to uodate my comment tool.
Rae,
DeleteNo problem on letting your mind wander, darling. I completely agree and understand. It's honestly probably just a writers thing. I am always able to put into words what I sometimes would more or less not say for the same reason, the fear of not being heard, understood, feelings reciprocated, or rejected. In my case, I have people that I open up to and those are my "safe people." I have developed a relationship with them and I know they won't take what I say and hurt me with it. Those relationships are vital and honestly few and far inbetween.
Also, I visited your blog and let me just say that we both turned 25 this week! Yay! Happy birthday! My birthday was February 6th and yours it today I believe your post said. So cool. I also see that we both live in Texas. I have tons of family in Houston (my dad's entire side) and I use to live in Columbus (near Katy) for a few years.
It seems like you are just starting out (so am I). I wish you lots of success and feel free to message me through the contact form or on any of my social media. Also, yes to the comment section! I may be able to help.
xx, Kels
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